“Should We See A Sex Therapist?”

couple considering sex therapy

Is It Time For Us To See A Sex Therapist?

This question is one that many couples are afraid to ask. While “couples counseling” may come up more frequently and more readily, sex therapy requires an additional jump. For some couples, they worry that even asking the question is admitting to more of a problem. However, understand that considering sex therapy does not need to signify a crisis. It could mean the difference between “pleasing touch” and “energizing, exciting touch.”

7 Points About Sex Therapy

Here are seven points to consider if you have never seen a sex therapist.

  1. The sessions involve no touching.

Some people have the impression that a sex therapist is a sex surrogate, or that the therapist “assists” you and your partner in touching each other. This is absolutely not the case. All of the touching you will do will be on your own, outside of our session.

  1. You will not necessarily need to reveal past indiscretions.

You may have had an extensive sexual history before meeting your current partner. Good for you! You do not need to share that detailed history, but relevant patterns potentially play an important role.

  1. This is talk therapy at its core.

The therapy in our office is not physical therapy. It is rooted in talking. The more we can comfortably discuss our sexual desires and our current sexual interactions, the more we can understand each other. Many couples do not discuss sex much between themselves. We can help you speak more freely, more candidly, and more constructively.

  1. Sex therapists are optimists.

We believe that you and your partner have brilliant, fulfilling, satisfying sex in your future. We are here to help you realize that future. Our job is never to assign blame or cast aspersions. Realizing there are options in our sexuality and relating means there is always hope.

  1. Religion does not need to enter into it.

Your religious beliefs are your business, not mine. Whatever your faith instructs you to feel about sex is not part of our work together. If that is something you wish to discuss, I am happy to talk about it with you, because it may actually be related to why you are in the office. But this is a judgment free zone.

  1. You do not need to delve into past traumas.

Millions of people in this country have experienced sexual trauma. If you would like to work with me on healing from that trauma, I am here to help. But if you would rather not talk about that history, I fully respect that decision. Anything you would like to avoid in our conversations is completely under your control. I am happy to help explain the benefits of such discussions – the choice is ultimately yours to make.

  1. It is natural to be uncomfortable at first.

Our society can teach us that sex is not a subject to discuss, even with our sexual partners. I will never expect you to speak comfortably at first. Whatever your state of comfort is, it is perfectly fine. I can help you talk about feelings, impulses, and desires that you may not be accustomed to discussing. Do not worry about that at all.

Charlotte NC Sex Therapy Services With Kim Ronk

If you are looking for an experienced Sex Therapist in the Charlotte NC and surrounding areas, please call me at (980) 224-0235, or use the contact form to send an email.